Happy Thanksgiving

(picture from last summer, if I remember correctly she was lame, and I was sad, so this picture works)

Waking up today was hard. It was hard to get out of bed. Getting out of bed meant that it was indeed a new day and one day closer.I had a horrible, horrible dream last night. I am sure that bad dreams are normal, it was so obviously not real, but I couldn't help myself. My brother (who keep in mind is a pharmacist) was putting her down, but only gave her ACE, Denali woke up and got scared and ran away and then we couldn't find her. Someone did find her and put her down before I got there. I hate bad dreams. It's hard to believe that it's tomorrow (well, if the weather holds out) and if it can't be tomorrow, I just don't know.

My heart hurts, it actually aches which I didn't realize was even possible. Even with the approaching loss of Denali I am still thankful. I have to be.

• I am thankful for the 2 years, 4 months, 2 weeks and 5 days I have had Denali in my life.
• I am thankful for all that she has taught me and the love she showed me.
• I am thankful that on that July day 2 years ago, I was at that auction, bought that pretty bay filly and gave her the life she might not have had.
• I am thankful for my husband and the joy he brings to my life, even in my darkest days.
• I am thankful for my family and their health and compassion.
• I am thankful for the roof over my head, and that even in this economy I have a job (although there are the days I just want to walk away.)
• I am thankful for my readers and the help you have given me through this journey.

Happy Thanksgiving

Dear Readers

Dear Readers,

You are my rainbow in this storm, my warm blanket on a cold night, you are what keeps me going when all I want to do is crawl up in a ball and die right alongside Denali. This has been one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but your kind, kind words of support. Your dedications to her on your blogs, the fact that I can feel your love and support from wherever you are is what is helping to keep me going.

I don't know what else to say, simply put: thank you. You are my hero's. You are my friends. Thank you for loving my horse right along with me. Thank you for your words of encouragement when things got tough, when I got scared. You helped me to get back in the saddle. Thank you for your words of encouragement when I went to my first horse show. And when I had to make the hardest decision I've ever had to make, thank you for showing me your kindness, love and support. You helped me to become the rider I am today, and now in the darkest days of my life, you are what helps me going.

For that I am eternally grateful. I wish there was something I could do to show you how much I appreciate all you've done for me, for what you've done for us.

Much Love,
Denali's Mom