Friday, November 26, 2010

Roller Coaster

There's Denali this morning, after the vet called us out. She's a sweaty, sweaty mess, and totally dirty because she kept running, then rolling, and then running. Fine by me.

To say that my husband and I have not been on a roller coaster ride of emotions would be a HUGE lie. We're still confused, very confused. We haven't talked to the vet since we saw her this morning so we don't know how Denali looked once she calmed down and stopped running around. The vet said we'll know more once Denali's adrenaline is out of her system, but today she looked good.

The past three weeks have been horrible. A horrible ride with both Denali and I coming so close to death. I'm still shocked that I didn't break anything when she trampled me. What would have happened if the truck wouldn't have cancelled??? We were not going to let her out to run around because we didn't want her to get hurt.

We still don't know what is going to happen, and I will feel better once we hear from the vet again. We have the truck "on hold" for now. I am getting sick just thinking of the vet bills. Unbelievable stress overall, and hopefully it will be worth it with some definitive answers.


12 comments:

Slbaldwin said...

Rollercoaster is right, but you will end up doing the right thing I can feel it! When I read your post I can't but help of think of my grandfather, who was super sick then all of a sudden better for a month, a total 180 difference and one day as healthy as he could possibly be which wasn't that healthy but it was for him, he passed suddenly and swiftly. I hope if Denali has to be put down I pray this is a way of her "ending it on a good note" like I'm sure you tried doing while riding :)

Keep your head up high and your family close you can do this!

Frizzle said...

Miss Denali Pony looks all bright and chipper (and wondering where the hell her treats are!).
I know it must be terribly difficult having your emotions plunge and soar with every passing minute; but, hopefully, things will take an upward turn. Remember, the great thing about hitting rock bottom is at least you have something to push off of!
Stay strong, girl -- I really hope we'll be sending Denali a "Welcome Home" care package (complete with the "buttload of Cherry Lik-its" that Andrea mentioned).
Sending positive vibes Denali's way!

Snowhawk Przhevalsky said...

Here's hoping, and PRAYING, that this is a Thanksgiving miracle. I really, really hope...

... I'm still going to frame and send you the picture.

(And in reply to your last entry, we can't hate you! This is really an emotional roller coaster, and you have every right to fell scared and confused and wonder just what the hell you should do! *send hugs*)

Kristen Eleni Shellenbarger said...

This is all part of it sometime....sometimes they throw us a HUGE curve ball. You will know what to do...just keep listening and laying out options and watching Denali. She will tell you in your gut what to do. There is no true timeline to follow..it's all about her comfort and YOURS.
She looks beautiful :)

achieve1dream said...

If EPM truly comes and goes is it possible to treat her again or maybe she's just getting better? I'm confused too. I can't wait for you to hear something from your vet. I wonder if he's seen anything like this before. I'm so happy she's improving. She looks so gorgeous and happy in her picture. Please keep us updated and I am still praying for the brave girl!

pam said...

Prayers....

Miles On Miles said...

She's so, so beautiful in that picture:)

Denali's Mom said...

That's pretty much it Frizzle, she was like, Um. Truck. I heard about some truck and realized that it was not a treat truck. She was acting funny today, so I think she's mad at us. I would be. I explained to her yesterday what would happen today, and told her that we would follow behind her, but it would be a while. That some wonderful people would take care of her until we got there.

Who knows. We might have 1 more day, 1 more week, 1 more month, 1 more year or she might still end up in my back yard when she is 30. Regardless, I'm not taking her for granted, not that we did. A day at a time, day at a time.

The vet said it could be a misdiagnosis, but she had all the symptoms. It was so sad, and today, seemed fine. It really is very weird!!!!

Kate said...

All you can do is walk forwards into the unknown, one day at a time, and enjoy each day you have with her. Sending good thoughts to you both (and your husband).

Leah Fry said...

With such a strong rally, I'm sure you are second guessing yourselves. I pray that you are able to quiet your mind and keep perspective. You'll do the right thing.

Sydney_bitless said...

You know what I had a very lengthy chat with a good old friend of mine. She had a 36 year old Morgan gelding I remember riding when I was young. He got EPM when he was 20 and we didn't think he would make it. Basically at 25 he was a pasture puff from stumbling when being ridden, enjoying wandering from their barn to the orchard and antagonizing the other horses. I mentioned you and Denali and the troubles and she told me to tell you to not give up! She was in the exact same predicament as you were with her horse when they vaccinated him and it took him nearly 6 months. She did some different therapies with him and he eventually improved. After he got EMP he had 5 more useful riding years out of him. She never did vaccinate him again. Thats funny I would run into her.
Maybe the truck not coming was an indicator that shes not ready to go? I am sure she will let you know when shes ready. If shes barreling around 364982734832 MPH was she stumbling? Perhaps stall rest did her good?
I hope all is well. Stay strong and if you ever need anything please feel free to ask.

WishIHadAHorsey said...

Hang in there, you will know what to do. We pray for you and Denali (and your wonderful husband) every day.